Since his death last month, I have been listening to a great deal of Johnny Cash. I had been a casual listener of his music, but went and got several more of his albums after he died.
As I listen, the themes of his music become more and more apparent. Elements of loss, regret, redemption and faith echo through each song and one can hear especially how his faith provided a strong foundation for him. I am reminded of my own life in growing up.
As a child, I grew up in a church. I was intrigued by the thoughts of religion and how faith has shaped lives throughout time. I was so taken with interest that I majored in Religious Studies in college, much to my parents chagrin. College pretty much destroyed most tenets of my faith. I as I read the texts of the bible in their original language and studied the anthropology and sociology of early christianity (small c), I began to see how ethnocentric the blind application of faith was.
In the years since I gradutated, I have drifted through Buddhism, agnosticism, and have begun to re-experience the non-academic side of Christianity (big c). What I realize I am missing is the faith. Listening to Johnny Cash's immense faith coming through his music, I realize I miss that warm blanket of faith that allows people to trust that everything will be all right in the end.
As I get older, I realize that I need to try to discover the middle ground where faith is not blind, but still there.